Home > observations and ramblings > out of the door, line on the left, one cross each.

out of the door, line on the left, one cross each.

I am constantly mystified by the overly Malaysian tendency to craft really horrible songs with really horrible lyrics for each and every campaign and/or thing and/or practice the government decides to try and put into action and/or promote.

I honestly don’t get it. Honest to god (more a figure of speech than anything, really), I don’t.

One, of course, can argue that sending a message through music is the most effective way, since people will remember it and it will stick in their heads and shit like that, but honestly, what actually gets stuck in people’s heads? The lyrics, yes. Not the message, not the shitty promotion of some shitty campaign, no. It’s the lyrics. And you know what? 50 bucks says that 80% of the people who do get the songs stuck in their heads are kids, and what the fuck do they know?

During my time all we knew was making fun of the song making the rounds at the time, which was that ridiculously bad song promoting the big thing at that moment: IT. Yes, it was thatcinta IT, sayang IT” song. Which, of course, we all sang as “cinta air tin, sayang air tin,” alongside many other permutations.

And, good god, you think that they’d at least make an effort to write decent songs and lyrics and come up with a decent video (for, of course, propaganda educational purposes during ad breaks on TV), but no. They write shit songs with shit lyrics (particularly when they attempt to write English lyrics… more on that later) accompanied by shitty videos that either involve bad acting, bad cinematography, bad clothes, bad editing, hilariously bad/old stock footage or all of the above. Come on. For the love of god, people!

(And you people do, right?)

On the topic of English lyrics, there was this one song about dengue (I know, very specific, but I apologise, it’s not like I would want to remember how it goes… although, hang on, I do remember one thing: the video accompanying it was either old as sin or used stock footage that was old as sin… hell, the song itself may be old as original sin) with some incredibly cringe-worthy lyrics and singing. Not only were the lyrics horrible, but the they were sang borederd on the criminal. PRONOUNCE WORDS PROPERLY, YOU BLITHERING IDIOTS! AND IF YOU CAN’T, FIND PEOPLE WHO CAN!

I swear to god, if I hear one more singer or MC or newscaster or WHO-THE-FUCK-EVER who speaks English in that ridiculously wrong, ridiculously Malaysian, ridiculously overdone way of speaking I might just punch someone in the face. I can overlook not being able to speak properly, there’s nothing particularly wrong with that (hell, no-one speaks properly, if I may be fair… which I am not, most of the time), but speaking like that and speaking/singing with so much gusto that you sound worse than the experience of having earwax sucked out of one’s ear is just bloody infuriating.

You know what I’m talking about. Watch that bloody Breakfast Show on NTV7, there’s bound to be some voicover girl/guy (particularly during one of their features) that will sound exactly like that.

If you can say that that particular way of speaking does not annoy you at all, I can only shake your hand and offer you hearty congratulations for being a much more tolerant man (or woman) than I am, and probably will ever be.

All the while, of course, wondering if you’re deaf.

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