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fuckin’ reds!

My History of Human Civilization class (last one for this semester, dunno if that’s a good or bad thing actually) today was taken up by a “debate” on whether to implement socialism or communism in the situation we were given — that of a population of survivors living on an island after nuclear war with 3/4ths of the world irradiated and useless.

Is it bad that the first thing that came to my mind was Fallout 2?

Anyway.

I didn’t read up on communism, socialism or capitalism. My group was supposed to research socialism but we, of course, left it until late and ended up just doing copy pasta with some original ideas on the weaknesses of socialism (which I provided).

Now, there’s something really wrong with me being able to write about weaknesses of socialism (based on, admittedly, very little knowledge) but having to argue for socialism.

Needless to say, the “debate” was filled with half-truths, total inaccuracies and a strange fixation on “equality”, which our lecturer mentioned was inaccurate (somehow), but urged us to find out ourselves what exactly was innacurate about it.

As a result, I decided to read up on Communism, particularly Marx’s Communist Manifesto, since it seemed the logical place to start. I’ve gotten to the third chapter and while I certainly have been reading it, I doubt I’ve actually been understanding it. The most I’ve gotten from it is stuff about toppling the bourgeoisie and the forming fo a proletariat state, abolishing private property and family, the inevitable deterioration of the proletariat’s living conditions as industrial advancement continues (which has been proven untrue, I believe.. well, at least not like Marx says) and other things which I feel like I need to look up in order to write down here.

Which means that I don’t really remember or even understand those things.

Fuck, I’m not sure if I even need to read all this stuff (in terms of the exam, not in terms of general learning) but there’s something that makes me want to read and try to understand all of it. I don’t really agree with it much (aside from the anti-capitalism stuff, and even then not 100%), which I believe is subconciously impeding me from understanding it (“oh no, I disagree, therefore I’ll shut my mind completely”).

Which is something I really want to overcome.

Exams in 2 weeks. I know nothing about 3 of the 4 subjects I’m sitting for.

Daaaaaaaaaaaamn.

(I just noticed that I like to end posts with a short sentence or even a single word. Why is this? Do I feel like it’s more “artistic”? Or is it a habit? Or does it look more “stylish”? I seriously don’t know)

holy crap really bad post.

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